Friday, January 18, 2013

Akibaranger Announcement Event (translated!)

The recent Super Hero Fest event in Tokyo featured a surprise guest. It seems that a mysterious someone ordered a delivery to a very specific location. Grumbling and griping about how boring his life has become, Nobuo Akagi, the former Akiba Red, took the stage in front of an entire auditorium of screaming fans.

Though initially shocked, Akagi recovered shortly after.

"Oh, I get it," he said. "You guys saw the TV show, right? Thanks very much!"

Akagi went on to explain that Malshina was going to give us enough of a fight to last another six months at least, but unfortunately Hatte Saburo, the executive producer of every Super Sentai show, put a stop to that.

"How am I supposed to become a hero like this?! And then as soon as we couldn't transform anymore, Mitsuki and Yumeria just took off!"

Suddenly, the sound of the MMZ-01 communicator came out of the box he was supposed to deliver!

"What? A MoeMoe Z-Cune?!"
"Yes... this is Akagi Nobuo."
"Eh? What'd you say? What? Seriously, what... oh, it's just Hatte Sabu... HATTE SABURO?!"
"Yes, yes, yes! Official? No, I'm not still trying to become official, no way."

With a sudden shock, Nobuo tearfully nods his head.
"Yes. Okay. Absolutely."

He turns to the audience, sobbing: "Hatte Saburo said... Akibaranger... IS BACK!"

Akagi then wound into his transformation pose, but stopped just short of shouting, "GRAND DELU--- hang on, wait wait wait. Good kids of the audience, I am about to transform into a HERO. Therefore, because this is not reality and just a delusion, good kids shouldn't watch. So, adults... please cover the good kids' eyes for me."

"Okay, here we go... here we go. Hey! That mom over there, cover that kid's eyes! You don't want your kid to become like these adults out here!"


Suddenly, the lights went down, and the transformation tune played. When the lights came back up, Akiba Red was standing next to Akagi, and Akagi ran off!

"Okay, let's do this... if it's dinosaurs we're talking about, I'd be Abare Blue... and I'd want Ptera. Like, when Ptera gets hungry, she's like GABURINCHO!" -- he's making a reference to both Abaranger and the new Kyoryuger here.

"Pain is... pain is... pain is...!"

Unfortunately, the audience isn't getting fired up enough, and Akagi coughs, so he calls for a do-over. The second time, he manages to get the audience to fill in the "... power!" part with him.

He begins to do the pose, but stops short of finishing.

"I can't do this by myself! Solo is not sentai at all! I'm going to need to get some new members."

"Are there any delusional people with color names out there? Like, uh... Midorikawa-san...or... Momoi-san, or... Tasaki-san, no, wait, not that one... Kaneda-san or... Shirakura-san?"

The mention of Midorikawa gets a big laugh, since Midorikawa is the last name of the voice actor who provided the voice of the monster that fueled Yumeria's fujoshi fetish fantasies from Season 1, Kabuki-cho. Momoi is the last name of the singer of the Akibaranger theme song. Tasaki is Akibaranger's director. Kaneda is referencing Osamu Kaneda, a director of the Kamen Rider series, and Shirakura is name of the Akibaranger's producer. 

Each one of their names has a color kanji in it. Midorikawa is green, Momoi is pink, Kaneda is gold, and Shirakura is white. Tasaki is mentioned, since he's the show's director, but Akagi says his name won't work -- it doesn't have a color kanji in it.

(This is intended as a joke, by the way, and a shout out to the crew, not as any indication of who's going to be in the show.)

The show ends with Akiba Red exiting stage right, while, "GOOD KIDS, DON'T WATCH."  appears on the screen.

Here's the video if you want to watch it yourself.

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